¢¢¢ Noncentsical ¢¢¢

Non-cents-ical but change. Haha wow, I'm just that cool. What I mean is this post has nothing to do with money but it does with change and change is ya know...cents and then I was like WOA I can use cents symbols ¢¢¢ YAY! lol. I've delighted myself with change today. I tried a new (not so healthy) but delicious frozen food today. It's like a corn dog...but instead it's sausage wrapped in pancake. OMGSH heaven. I also happened to paint my finger and toenails for the first time in a long time. And biggest off I'll I'm now a red-head. Well...not like a ginger...like auburn, but trust me it's RED. Just not the ginger variety...like the rainbow variety...I mean not quite that intense but I have had a Rudolph comment already :) I love it though. That's all that counts.

I was going through a lot of frustration and being upset before I went to camp [dealing more specifically with the family] and camp seems to clear that up, it's weird. I can just enjoy the simple things like fingernail polish, sausage and hair dye. wooo. XD

Freunde--> Friends

My childhood was less than normal. My whole life has been less than normal, but then again who sets that standard? It's another one of those invisible but oh so visible and influential things. It's frustrating...but personally I'm proud to not equal the norm. I bring this up due to my friends history. Kids sum you up based on a first impression and what surrounds you. as you grow older the selection of quality friends becomes easier, or it's supposed to. When I was little had plenty of friends...and then I still did...but I've never felt safe with them. I mean I know they're not going to jump me...well they might but all in good fun. But trust. trust is a really hard thing. I've had people hurt me who I thought I could depend on and it's really messed me up. No one is to blame for how I am but me, but optimism and me aren't the best of friends. A guy screwed up my "romantic" life for good I do believe. Being used is awful...but finding someone you can really truly call on whenever is the best feeling in the world.

I always knew I'd probably not keep friends to adulthood that I made in elementary or middle school or even know. But the literal love of my life will always be with me no matter where our lives take us. We're not perfect, but I understand her I like to think and boy oh boy does she understand me. I still worry that I'm doing something that will ruin everything. Losing friends happens brutally and out of the blue with me. I hate it. but her I know I'll always have. I trust her and honestly I trust no-one. I feel like high school does that to people, ruins there trust. Perhaps college will expose me to more seasoned friends. But my love, is perfect and I never want to lose her. We're made for each other. I believe she was sent to me to make me realize that not everyone will screw me over. I can trust someone. Not everyone lies constantly and talks badly behind my back. It's okay to feel like someone is a true friend. She's taught me that and I sure hope I've taught her something and that she can depend on me. I have nothing but good things to say in front of and behind her back. I LOVE HER.

Tonight I went to her terribly upset and just needing someone and somehow she gives me perspective without any direct advice at all. She makes me feel loved. And that's what friends are for. :)

Something Fishy...Someone Unique

Hellooooo bloglings. t's been some days, but hey I'm a busy girl this summer. This summer is about experiences and boy I've had many. My therapist always reminded me to have fun and not be afraid of resting on the things I love. That's a writer's notebook page, don't forget the things I love. Each little heart bullet has something I love written beside it. A writer's notebook is really whatever you want it to be. I tend to doodle and draw a lot because it gets the creative juices flowing one way or another.

Flowing. Drifting. Boating. Nothing beats coasting down the river and catching fishies! Feast you're eyes on my two latest catch. [returned safe and sound to their river home].

Not forgetting who you are and not letting standards

and unwritten rules dictate your life path is

something I've been exploring a lot lately. I don't fit the teenage mold and quite frankly it's fine with me. I personally think the path I am taking could be the better one. High school doesn't have to be boys boys boys drama drama drama I think it's more about adjusting to change, savoring the last of childhood and figuring out who you truly are. I

wrote a piece on it. Good or bad, I'd like to share it.

The blog is called peace love writing. So I suppose

giving you a 'piece' of writing isn't a crime.

And here it tis:

Unwritten in Stone: Teen Love and Life

The teen years are "supposed" to be about being carefree and exploring all you can whilst you still have that home, those parents, that safety net. there are these unwritten sets of rules and bulleted lists of accomplishments one should seek to meet before the end of senior year. Date him, get ____, do ____, Why? There is no ancient scripture engraved in a cavern wall with these these "secrets to success". I don't feel the need to explore love or stupidity right now. I'm safe at home and it's my chance to figure myself out.Having fun is great, but finding you is helpful. If you're strong in who you are, the fun and daring doesn't end when you leave the nest...you're your own safety net. There is no over age 18 life experience must stop law. Real life, is just beginning. Who says if you haven't crossed off everything on "the ultimate high school experience list" you're doomed? I say erase the unwritten rules and figure who you are before worrying about everything and everyone else.

And there you have it. It's I guess an explanation. I don't feel like I have to date now. I don't have to experiment with drugs, or party till I drop. I don't have to be stupid. I've learned enough to know my boundaries and what's best for me. I'm beginning to shape me, for continued fun in the future...what's wrong with that? I'm happy. truly happy. And hopefully I brighten each and every fish's day when I release them back to their cool river homes, because hey...every now and again I do aim to please... just not usually ;-)

So Mad You Cry

I tend to get really angry and burst out in tears. I think it's a fairly common thing, but perhaps not. Tonight that would be a combination of wanting to get out and probably not getting to and my neighbors. My neighbors have the cops visit often. They are absolutely and completely STUPID. They can't park cars, show respect, think, or keep quiet. I just had a diff. neighbor move out and some of the bad neighbor cronies went over to the vacant for sale house and picked the flowers! And then lit up on their step. They have a hut, where they argue, smoke and drink and play terrible music. It's just FUN. Right now there is literally a MOUNTAIN of beside their house and it makes the whole area smell nasty. Oh and then there's the son over there who told me off about telling his kid not to throw rocks. He told me not to be an ass. He's an ass. and I know way more about kids then him. He's a dropout teen dad WITHOUT A JOB. Who sit on his ass all day long. It's great. GAH.

As for the getting out. I want to go from a drive with "old standby". He said sure, cuz we have so much to catch up on. He came to visit me the other day on his BIKE for that reason...and I was leaving. :\ I just need some time to vent and it'd be good for that. For both of us. But it doesn't look likely... meh. As for other events...not much. Just trying to stay calm after a neighbor run in and avoid dying from boredom :p

L8r bloglings.

The Good. The Bad. And the Ugly.

Teenagers gosh. I need to not overthink but my teenage hormones perhaps are getting the best of me. The sad part i, I can't brush it off as that. It feels like something more, which I HATE. There's hardware store boy...who is a really amazing person and I could stand a chance with. He's someone new and it's exciting to feel that way. Then there's old standby. I can't call him that. He's just him. I MISS him so much. We used to talk daily now it's close to never. This is kind of my fault...I scare him away with the fact that I can't get over how I feel. Finally I was over it, because he does really DUMB stuff. But... now the dreams are back. I don't want him in my dreams. He's just him. My friend who should stay that way but everytime a see one of his relationships crash and burn I can't help but think someday he'll realize what was right in front of him the entire time.

Nothing will happen with either because I'm good on my own enjoying summer to the absolute fullest. Sunshine, a license, exercise and THE BEACH. The love of my life and I went to the beach yesterday, it was amazing. We acted foolish and just fully enojoyed ourselves. We did model poses and gymnastic stunts, froze in the water and attempted to build sandcastles, critiqued the lifeguard, and just walked the gorgeous length of the beach.

Teenagehood is filled with new found conflict, as you flail around trying to figure out who YOU are. Teenagehood brings joys that you only have those short years to experiance. Teenagehood brings carefree to responsibility. It's just a mess, but all you can do is make the best of it. :p

Peace. Love. Writing. AND Music.

I'm very into my music lately. Violin just brings me great joy. I recorded some video of my violin endeavours and my favorite I care to share. Enjoy. The piece is Seven Scottish Airs, by Holst. I also am into anything music related...like dancing. I just feel like being engulfed in the beats and tones of music. I am potentially taking up salsa dancing. That's right, cuban, flirty, sexyyyyy SALSA. Not the food the dance ;-) There's a local dance studio which has a 4 week class starting next week. I'm really pumped. My best friend in the whole wide world may join me on this adventure and it will be just a BLAST. The studio also holds free balls once monthly. Which will be awesome to go to. Music music music. And writing... and love.... and peace. :)

Gone Fishin' @ the Hardware Store

Spontaneity is the spice of life. Really happy coincidences are well...happy. That feeling that fills you can't be matched. When you've just been dragged out to the hardware store with your dad and you come around the corner and meet a familiar face. Just a boy, that you've seen in each and every driver's ed class before and have rode home with his father and he multiple times, but this time as you stand there leaning against the lumber cart and he says hello, you choke on your words, your face goes red and you're sent into a whirlwind of thoughts about him never explored before. Like him? that's crazy. He's just that kid from driver's ed. He's nice and all but this wasn't planned. Newsflash life doesn't follow any plan.

I plan to go fishing today but who knows where I'll have been by day's end. I like not being afraid and letting life HAPPEN, it's fun and exciting and I wouldn't change it for the world, for better or for worse. Life is a gift, filled with surprises. Like re-inventing yourself or your impressions of someone else to create a beautiful melody. Or going with the flow like a flawless harmony. ♫♪♫

♫♪♥♣♠•Mish-Mash ♫♪♥♣♠•

I'm a very diverese person with little sense of organization and direction. Sure, I know what I want to do with my life. I have goals, but if something pops into my head that sparks an interest by gosh it usually comes out. Sometimes it just goes into the writers notebook, perhaps to spark further interest later, sometimes I end up talking. Quite often actually. I'm a very social person who also enjoys her space and alone time. Today I am presenting a mish-mash of me. It's kind of a scrapbook of sorts. I'm just going to throw out awesome everything. pieces of books I like, pieces of my pieces, quotes, words, pictures, stories, anything that seems to come along. It's my nature, being random and jumbled up. It's quite fun so, just go with the flow and enjoy what I present to you. :D

palpable: able to be touched.

(shag carpeting is palpable and you WANT to touch it)

"the heat and radiating emotion coming from the intertwined bodies, could move moutains."

"Because a true friend is a promise you keep forever" (Sarah Dessen)

daedal (rolls off the tounge nicely don't it?!) :

skillful; artistic; ingenious

enconium. demonic. intoxicating.

lofty. lucid. furrowed.

I begin every writer's notebook with at the very least two full pages of words. Words are writing. Vocabulary is key to producing the effect that you are trying to have on your readers. Writer's notebooks are also key. You have to have something with you at all times that you can scratch in as you observe the world around you.

"Sometimes, in order to save yourself, you've got to reach out to someone else." (Sarah Dessen)

SWOON.

Lust, envy, pride, wrath, sloth, gluttony, greed.

7 [Not so Deadly]

Notable Authors:

Jodi Picoult (favorite of all time)

Sarah Dessen

Libba Bray

Danielle Steele

"A dream is a wish your heart makes." Cinderella


No one will know what this means here unless of course one of my friends stumbles across it, but it deserves to be spoken whenever possible: Tim pukes in bushes!!!

On a Tim note: "I love the smell of Napalm in the morning." (Mulan)

YEA KISS.

Other amazing music:

♫♪♫♪ Tesla, Red Jumpsuit Apparatus, Three Days Grace, Evanescence, Quiet Riot, Metallica, Taylor Swift ♫♪♫♪

"Ohana means family, family means nobody gets left behind. Or forgotten." Lilo and Stitch

Must Reads:

Someone Like You- Sarah Dessen

everything written By Jodi Picoult

Seven Deadly Sins Series- Robin Wasserman

Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants- Ann Brashares

The Nature of Jade- Deb Caletti

The Gift- Danielle Steele

All American Girl- Meg Cabot

CRIME SCENE Inside the World of the Real CSIs- Connie Fletcher

Kissed by an Angel- Elizabeth Chandler

best movie on the planet FORREST GUMP.

"Mama always said life is like a box of chocolates never know what you're gunna get."

I emote.

>=- grumpy

XD estatic/naughty

o.0 stink eye/HUH?

:-* kisses

-.- annoyed

8-D cool!

:( sad

:) happy

:D really happy!

:c really sad.

We all go a little mad sometimes. Haven't you? - Alice in Wonderland

He may be mad, but there's method in his madness. There nearly always is method in madness. It's what drives men mad, being methodical. -G. K. Chesterton

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

Welcome Aboard.

I guess going to the beach put me in a nautical mood? It is very early in the morn... I haven't slept yet, because I was suddenly filled with drive. Woo! Fair warning to all, most days you won't get much from the ramblings posted to this blog but on occasion I hope to surprise you.

I'm a writer so hopefully now and again the way i string words together will make you think or "ohhh and ahhhh" or perhaps be engulfed in sudden emotion. Feel free to yell at me or compliment outloud, it's a writer thing...talking to your computer. You tend to talk to your writing too. My pieces are kind of like my children as weird as that sounds. Sometimes I look at them just to look at them and appreciate their existence which is even sketchier. I have a life. I go outdoors and do things without thinking about writing. It's a passion, not a lifestyle. Okay it's a lifestyle too it really is but not in a like totally consumes you sense...well that will probably come someday... by the way, I'm Katarzyna. Well that's my alias anyhow. I'm a teenager with many interesting life experiences and a dedication to writing. I'm blogging for something to do and of course because I'm simply attached to putting words on a page. I like to read to so if you have a blog notable of my eyes let me know. (it don't take much to be notable, so please do share)

I may post some writing, some pictures and various assortments of stuff that I feel should be posted. I'll speak German and make no sense. I'll present exciting and intriguing quotes and sometimes put down a word of the day for the heck of it. Music, music might be coming, there is nothing like it. (I'm a violinist btw who just found the orchestral/violin score of the four seasons for sale w. technique disks and such. it's incredibly exciting) Blogging isn't new to me so I can predict where this will go...I bet you can already see the majority consists of random bits. Once again I think it's a writer's thing, being random...going on tangents and not knowing where you began. Then there are more serious times where I'll just vent to the open Internet because I like to hear my fingers on the keys and see the text on the pretty blog background and I know that I don't have to worry about the blog not wanting to listen or my hand cramping or losing it. It set there for me to reflect upon and do with as I please and perhaps it will...help some one? ha ha ha. The predicaments I encounter are like no other...but maybe just maybe something here sometime will be of use.

If not oh well. it's for my writing and I, not for you; you'll get over it. Welcome aboard this fun ship come aboard if you like or abandon ship before you're in so deep there's no turning back. ;-)

Her name be: Peace. Love. Writing.

♥♥♥